Archive for the ‘Kooky’ Category

You know you have a fat ass when…

Utrecht police say a 21-year-old Dutch man is recovering after a “mooning” that went horribly wrong.

A police statement says the man and two others had run down a street in Utrecht with their pants pulled down in the back “for a joke.”

It says that at one point the 21-year-old “pushed his behind against the window of a restaurant” that broke and resulted in “deep wounds to his derriere.”

I wish they would have told us how many stitches he needed.

– Powered By Stuffr! –

This is not funny. This is real. Keep a straight face and read on.

The Panties for Peace campaign was launched by a group of women peace activists from a Burmese peace activist group called – Lanna Action for Burma which is based in Thailand. Since we initiated the panties for peace campaign for Burma, women’s panties (as well as male underwear) have been mailed out by activists to Burma’s foreign missions in Australia, Singapore, and European countries.

Our act of delivering our underwear to the Burmese foreign missions across the globe is of immense importance and symbolic in protest of Myanmar junta’s violent crackdown of monks-led rallies in Yangon last month, and to oust the generals ruling the country from power.

Does this mean there will be thousands of women sitting at their computers with no panties now? I can’t think of a better cause to support.

– Powered By Stuffr! –

Have you heard the one about the genius that walked into the pawn shop?

Staffers at a pawn shop in Fort Lauderdale thought the shopper with a goatee looked suspicious. Their instincts were confirmed Monday when, two minutes later, a red dye pack exploded in the man’s pants. He fled the store, ditching a stolen wad of cash that contained the theft-detection device.

…

No one was injured but bystanders in the shop complained their eyes stung from the dye mixture that contained some Mace.

Okay, their eyes were burning. Imagine how Mr. Genius felt. Ha!

– Powered By Stuffr! –

One must be very crafty to pull off something like this.

A nude maid is accused of really cleaning up at a Florida man’s home. The Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office said a 50-year-old man hired the maid from the Internet on Friday to clean his Tampa home.

Authorities said the woman arrived at the home in a one-piece, light colored dress. She took off the dress and cleaned the house for $100-per-hour. Sheriff’s office spokeswoman Debbie Carter said the man told deputies he left the maid alone in the bedroom to clean.

When the man’s wife came home from vacation, she discovered $40,000 in jewelry missing from their bedroom.

Police are investigating.

Either she looked damned good and he didn’t notice, or she was quite talented at hiding things.

– Powered By Stuffr! –

What a jackass.

A donkey is doing time in southern Mexico for assault and battery.

The animal was locked up at a local jail that normally holds people for public drunkenness and other disturbances after it bit and kicked two men near a ranch in Chiapas state, police said Monday.

Officer Sinar Gomez said the donkey will remain behind bars until its owner agrees to pay the men’s medical bills.

– Powered By Stuffr! –

Don’t you hate it when reporters make themselves part of the story?

A newspaper photographer got a little too close to the action at the state high school track championships — and was speared through the leg by a javelin.

Ryan McGeeney of the Standard-Examiner was spared serious injury in Saturday’s mishap, and even managed to snap a photo of his speared leg while others worked to help him.

“If I didn’t, it would probably be my editor’s first question when I got back,” McGeeney said later.

– Powered By Stuffr! –

People just aren’t attentive anymore.

Thieves took off with a 6-foot-tall, 2,000 pound anchor, and no one noticed. For four months. La Crosse police are searching for whoever took the gray-blue anchor that was mounted outside the Naval Reservist Station.

Someone had to see something. I mean anything. There had to be heavy equipment involved if they took off with a 2,000 pound anchor.

– Powered By Stuffr! –

Personally, I cannot stand the taste of inflated milk. I prefer 2%.

Federal commodity regulators are investigating a price-manipulation scheme by the farmer-owned dairy cooperative that controls about a third of the nation’s milk supply, according to a published report.

Separately, the Justice Department is preparing to investigate a recently disclosed $1 million transfer to a former director of the Dairy Farmers of America, The Wall Street Journal reported Monday, citing people close to the matter.

I know people are innocent until proven guilty, but I wouldn’t doubt that this has been happening. About 6 months ago, the price of milk skyrocketed around here, and it never went back down. This was before oil went through the ceiling, or any other factors could have been attributed to it. I thought they were gouging then, and I still think so.

I wonder where they find inflated cows?

– Powered By Stuffr! –

Fourteen tons of cookies are spilled on the highway. Why? Because the dolt fell asleep at the wheel!!!

Police say a trailer loaded with 14 tons of double-stuffed Oreos has overturned, spilling the cookies still in their plastic sleeves into the median and roadway.

Illinois State Police Sgt. Brian Mahoney says the truck’s driver was traveling from Chicago to Morris on Interstate 80 around 4 a.m. Monday when he fell asleep at the wheel and slammed into the median.

Imagine all the Oreo cookie pie crusts you could make from all those crushed cookies. Hey! The article says they were still in their plastic sleeves, that should have made it that much easier to smash them to make the crusts.

No charges have been filed, but there should be some sort of Oreo cookie assault law on the books.

– Powered By Stuffr! –

Ha! Pennies. Where in the heck can you still get 150,000 pennies?

Ken Griffey Jr. owed Cincinnati Reds teammate Josh Fogg US$1,500, and paying by cheque just wouldn’t do.

So when Fogg arrived in the Reds clubhouse Wednesday, he found his locker filled with 150,000 pennies – 60 boxes, each weighing 16 pounds and containing $25 worth of pennies.

“Basically, it’s like having 60 bowling balls in your locker, only with no holes to pick them up with,” Griffey said.

I know, I know, from Josh Fogg. But other than him, where? I don’t think any of the banks near me even have 150,000 pennies on hand.

– Powered By Stuffr! –